Thursday, March 14, 2013

We know Guy Code…but what about Girl Code? by: Jennifer Sanchez


  At any given time, on any given day, a girl will be casually scrolling through her Twitter timeline, procrastinating on something she should be doing, when she will come across some girl raving about her boyfriend and how great he is, how considerate he can be, how well he treats her. At any given time, on any given day, this same girl will roll her eyes and mutter under her breathe, “How well he treats you?  Yeaaaah, you and 3 other girls.”
       We have all been there.  Innocently wasting time on social media when we run across some poor, naive, stupid girl raving about her “amazing boyfriend” who we know FOR A FACT is cheating on her.  We may know the other girl he’s sleeping with.  Hell, we might BE the other girl he’s sleeping with. Or maybe we just know that her boyfriend is just a bum because we have seen texts he’s sent other women, heard about dates he’s taken other ladies on, or physically seen homeboy out with Lauren, Ashley, and Angelica.  So…since we all have been in this situation, what’s the protocol?  Ladies, is there any female code that obligates me to look out for my fellow woman and hip her when her bf is cheating?
      Two weeks ago, a girl got RTed onto my timeline raving about her boyfriend and some “super thoughtful” morning text he sent her.  First of all…a morning text?  That’s where we are setting the bar at for boyfriends now? Okay, let’s just all pretend he’s not sending that text while someone else is tangled all up in his sheets.  I SAID LET’S PRETEND.  I didn’t know this girl.  I’ve never met this girl a day in my life.  If she committed a crime, I’m pretty sure I couldn’t pick her out of a lineup. (I did, however, recognize her name, and I know she’s allegedly “the girlfriend” of a guy who also went to my school.  He slept around in college and clearly he’s continuing this streak of being a real class act. )
       Although I didn’t know her, I still felt BAD FOR HER.  If she found out her BF was cheating on her, I’m sure she’d be hurt, feel so betrayed, have a hard time trusting men again, blah blah blah, but most importantly, HOW EFFIN’ STUPID WOULD SHE LOOK?!  I’ve been cheated on and as shallow as this seems, one of my first thoughts was “Does everyone know?!  Am I the last dummy on Earth who wasn’t aware?!  OHMYGOD SHOULD I GET TESTED?!”  (That was a joke.  Everyone calm down.  But seriously…get tested. )
Every time I find out that some woman is getting cheated on, I battle with the pros and cons of telling her.  PROS:  1- You’d save her from some humiliation and embarrassment.  Not a lot.  But some.  2- You’d want to know if your BF was cheating on you so why wouldn’t you give her the same courtesy?  3- You’d be doing a good thing for your gender, your sex, your female “I am woman- hear me roar!” counterparts.  After all, aren’t we all in this together?!
       CONS of telling this girl that her BF is a bum: 1- This situation has nothing to do with you. 2- She will probably cuss you out and tell you that you’re hating. 3- This situation has nothing to do with you. 4- She will think you’re a jealous bitch. 5- This situation has nothing to do with you. 6- You don’t know her so you don’t owe her any explanation or help. 7- This situation has nothing to do with you.
As you can see, the cons far outweigh the pros here.  I want to help- I do.  I really believe that women should help women and we shouldn’t be so ready to…battle each other…for EVERYTHING.  But I’ll be damned if I’m trying to be a good Samaritan and help out some girl I don’t know and instead of getting a gratuitous “Thank you so much, you’re so wonderful, you didn’t have to help me but you did, how could I ever thank you, here, let me buy you dinner” spiel (Oh yeah, if I do one nice thing for you, you pretty much owe me for LIFE), I get some dodo bird cussing me out in 140 character burst.  And then to see this same airhead TAKE son back?!  And possibly subtweet some “dumb bitches always tryna take my man” about me? Oh nah. OOOHHHHH NAAAAAAH.  
You’re on your own, ladies.  

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